1/3 days down for my Grandpa’s “celebration of life” services. today was hard, but seeing everyone that he associated with, befriended, etc. was a good touch for today. good night gramps, see u again tomorrow. =)
life plays you in the most crazy ways. age, the process of getting sick and recovering and getting sick again, and the slow process of reaching whatever God entails for you is point blank stressful. I’m stressed the fuck out. Visiting and staying countless hours by my Grandpa’s bedside should fulfill whatever longing and satisfaction I have in my mind and in my emotions. But in the end, nothing can get fulfilled when you know the one you love and care for a lot is suffering. You just wish and pray that one person will just be fine and things will just go back to however it was before. Facing reality is the hardest when you cannot do anything about it. I love my Gramps and the start of this week has to require the start of my accepting whatever will happen. Hoping I’m ready when it comes if it does. But I know no one is ready for situations like these.